If we can find forgiveness in our hearts for those who have caused us hurt and injury, we will rise to a higher level of self-esteem and well-being. – James E. Faust [April 2007 Conference]

I think it’s probably the wrong way to think, and I could probably chalk it up to a problem with public speaking. but during Fast and Testimony meeting sometimes I think I’ll go up and say something, then someone will say something that seems like a bigger issue then what I might say and I stay in my seat because I don’t want to try and upstage someone elses problems.  Yes I know, I shouldn’t even think about it, but it’s just another easy way to keep from going up – though now all my kids seems to think they need to go and my time of sitting on the bench is probably numbered.

I can though find solace through writing. While I may not always be the most elegant writer, or make use of fancy words – it’s always helped me get out what’s stuck in my head. A healing process if you will.

I’m lucky I suppose, I usually have an easy time of forgiving people wrongs – though there have been occasions when it cut deep and it took time to come to terms with and forgive someone. I pride myself on not holding grudges. But recently, something happened. While I won’t go into specifics, suffice it to say it was a doozy.

Agency is the power to think, choose, and act for ourselves. It comes with endless opportunities, accompanied by responsibility and consequences. – Sharon G. Larsen [October 1999 Conference]

What this [event] does do, is offer a great lesson in free agency and the consequences of choice. My wife and I have tried to explain this to our children so that they can see that while we have this awesome gift from God there is also the responsibility and understanding that comes along with those choices. Each one having an effect that we may not see or even think about.

Personally, I think I was protected from this event’s fallout because of how I led my life – but my emotions come from what it does to my children. I’m angry at the effects that it will have on them. It also puts me into positions I don’t feel ready for, as I have to take on more roles. I am now responsible for more than just my own family. But don’t get me wrong – I’m not shying away from this – I’m just overwhelmed and feeling a bit unqualified for the roles I’ve now been pushed into. Like most things, it’ll take some time and I’ll need to lean more the Lord for help.

But what of forgiveness? Is it easy? As one of my new roles, I’ve had to become a great listener, an offerer of support. I listen to the anger and hatred from others and try to convert that into a willingness to forgive and while it doesn’t always work – it has put me more into a better position to forgive in myself. Honestly I don’t like the burden of being upset or hating someone – it’s too much, especially when I have to help others to move through their feelings and emotions. It just seems easier to forgive. I understand it’s not always easy to forgive, and I know it takes time. I’m not here to try and make it out like it’s as easy as flipping a switch or that the pain goes away in an hour. In this instance it was easier for me, but I’ve been through other situations where the pain and anger lasted longer and it took longer for me to forgive. But what is at stake shouldn’t be taken lightly either.

“Wherefore, I say unto you, that ye ought to forgive one another; for he that forgiveth not his brother his trespasses standeth condemned before the Lord; for there remaineth in him the greater sin.

“I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men” (D&C 64:9–10).

The Lord understands your pain – my pain. As I’ve struggled with knowing what to say to ease the pain for others and help them in their process, Mosiah has words of comfort;

“The Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease” (Mosiah 24:15)

So if you’re struggling with forgiveness for a wrong – unburden yourself. Turn to the Lord and lean on Him to carry you. I testify that your burdens will be made lighter.

My appeal in this message is that we control our tongues, and by speaking kind words to each other emulate in our relationships with each other the loving kindness the Lord has for his people

It’s interesting because, in this day of civility there seems to be anything but. So I thought it might be a great opportunity to talk about love and kindness.

With the mass devastation that has happened in Japan, and in other countries in the Middle East and North Africa, there are so many who are in need of love and kindness. But there is more than that. I am of the opinion that it is much easier to spread our love to foreign people when we are not directly involved, and this isn’t a rub on anyone – just an opinion. But it seems harder when it’s within arms length.  In the Bible, Luke says:

“Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful.” (Luke 6:35–36.)

Which are great words to try and live by – I know I struggle through the day to day grind of dealing with people who seem to have no idea how to operate through simple instructions with a myriad of questions (for the unknowing I’m a web developer, and build lots of corporate applications) , then I get home and I’m bombarded with the daily issues of life; busted wash machine, busted tooth, busted cat, reading current events, etc. So I’m pretty frazzled by the end.

Again referring back to the article above, Marion G. Romney points out when Paul was speaking to the Ephesians (Ephesians 4):

31 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: 32And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

Gives me pause, and gives me new found energy to try and do better. I know, we’re taught from the get go to love one another – but sometimes you forget. My wife, is always striving to better herself ran across some information about an interesting experiment.

If I said Emoto Masaru, would you know where I’m going, or would you already be google-ing it to try and figure out what it is? It’s okay, when my wife first said his name I had no idea who he was either.

The quick explanation if you haven’t already hit up Wikipedia is this:

Masaru Emoto (?? ? Emoto Masaru^?, born July 22, 1943) is a Japanese author and entrepreneur known for his claim that if human speech or thoughts are directed at water droplets before they are frozen, images of the resulting water crystals will be “beautiful” or “ugly” depending upon whether the words or thoughts were positive or negative. Emoto claims this can be achieved through prayer, music or by attaching written words to a container of water.

Since we don’t have access to all his equipment, we thought we’d try it with rice. Basically we’ve put cooked rice into two glass containers – one we speak kind words to and the other we speak harsh words to. The results are interesting to say the least.

We love one jar of rice, not the other...

I don’t know if you can see the difference here, but one jar is different – can you tell which jar of rice we spoke harsh words to? Alright, if you can see it’s the right side. The left side still looks edible (it’s brown rice to begin with). You can try this at home too.

But, and this is the question you can apply to yourself and the people around you,  if rice looks like this after a week – how do the people you speak unkind words to feel inside? How does it effect them in the long run? The Lord has some words concerning that, and it’s something you might want to consider. I know I need to work on it…

26 If any man among you seem to be religious, and bridleth not his tongue, but deceiveth his own heart, this man’s religion is vain. (James 1:24)

It’s my testimony, that if we can internalize the love that the Lord has for us then it will become part of our countenance. I know it can work, I know people that are so loving and forgiving that they epitomize the Lords love. As a parent this is where I learn how to be like God. I’ve always maintained that I love my kids no matter what they do. While it can be hard sometimes, and I sometimes get caught up in things I see that remind me what I don’t like about myself in my children – the words I choose to use can have a lasting effect on them.

So to wrap this all up I think Marion G. Romney says it best:

Let us, therefore, resolve to control our tongues and by speaking kind words to each other emulate the loving kindness of our Lord.

We live in a day of “wars [and] rumors of wars, and earthquakes in divers places.^” As prophesied, “the whole earth [is] in commotion” and “Satan is abroad in the land.” He seeks to destroy all that is good and righteous. He is Lucifer, who was cast out of the presence of God.

While alone, this quote is enough to get anyone paying attention a little nervous with all that is going on. We can let those sentences get the best of us, and at times I have – but we should be paying more attention to the next sentence of Elder Packer’s statement more so than the first four:

Against all of that, we have very positive feelings about what lies ahead.

Luckily a good friend of mine @LDSGuy has been paying better attention, not to mention we had been discussing if there would ever be missionaries in Egypt. I got a text message the other night from him, telling me to go look up sign #48. It has been awhile since I read 65 Signs of the Times and couldn’t remember what it was, so I was pretty excited to see what it was about. I will let him add the remainder of this post:

The way I figure it, either 1. the fullness of the gospel will be taken into Egypt, missionaries will be welcome, a temple will be built, the Egyptian people will enjoy the blessings of eternal marriage and being sealed to their families for eternity, or 2. the Muslim extremists in that region will take over and align themselves with other extremist groups in the region and attack a common enemy—Israel. Both seem plausible. Of course both could happen, with the latter occurring before the former.

Somewhere deep inside my mind I seem to recall scriptures mentioning something about Egypt’s role in the last days and what their status will be with respect to the gospel, but I was not able to locate any.

That is until I came across my copy of David Ridges’ book 65 Signs of the Times Leading up to the Second Coming and started thumbing through it that night. Lo! and behold there it was on page 127 and continuing over onto page 128. The answers to Egypt’s status in the last days was given to us eight centuries prior to Christ’s birth by the prophet Isaiah (Esaias in the New Testament Greek). I’m going to copy Brother Ridge’s explanatory notes (in italicize brackets) in these verses to help illustrate his views on this topic.

18 In that day [the last days] shall five [several] cities in the land of Egypt speak the language of Canaan [Israel; a prophecy of greatly improved relationship between Egypt and Judah in the last days], and swear to the Lord of hosts [make covenants with Jesus Christ, implying that they will have the true gospel]; one shall be called, The city of destruction [not a good translation; could be "city of the sun"].

19 In that day [the last days] shall there be an altar [a temple; in a temple] to the Lord in the midst of the land of Egypt, and a pillar [symbolic of a temple—see Revelation 3:12] at the border thereof to the Lord.

20 And it [the altar and the pillar] shall be for a sign and for a witness [reminder] unto [of] the Lord of hosts in the land of Egypt: for they [Egyptians] shall cry [pray] unto the Lord because of the oppressors, and he shall send them a saviour, and a great one, and he shall deliver them.

21 And the Lord shall be known to Egypt, and the Egyptians shall know the Lord in that day [the last days], and shall do sacrifice [see 3 Nephi 9:20; broken heart and contrite spirit] and oblation [see D&C 59:12]; yea, they shall vow a vow [make covenants] unto the Lord, and perform it [and will be faithful to them].

Here the author points out the fact that often times the Lord has to humble a group of people, and then save them for peril before they will listen to Him.

22 And the Lord shall smite Egypt: he shall smite and heal it [first humble it, then heal it]: and they shall return even to the Lord [the Egyptians will hear and live the gospel], and he shall be intreated [prayed to] of [by] them, and shall heal them [wonderful blessings are in store for Egypt].

Isaiah 19:18-22

After looking at this source further it seems to me that dark days still lie ahead for Egypt; however, the distant future will be a bright new dawn, full of gospel truths and saving ordinances.

Another excellent source I love to turn to when studying Isaiah is David R. Minert’s book Simplified Isaiah for the Latter-day Saints.

In covering Isaiah, Brother Minert does a remarkable job explaining Isaiah in simplified, modern terminology. Brother Minert consulted at least 12 different sources on Isaiah before coming up with his narrative of each verse in Isaiah.

In his book he covers chapter 19 by explaining details that have yet to happen for Egypt. These include, civil war (v. 2), a cruel king/leader (v. 4 – in my opinion this has yet to occur), all the water sources including the Nile river will dry up, plant life and the entire Egyptian economy will suffer as a result (vs. 5-10), the Egyptians will be fearful of even the mention of Israel (v. 17), eventually relations between Egypt and Israel will improve (v. 18), the gospel will be taught to Egyptians, a temple will be built (vs. 19-22), there will be an Arab alliance between Egypt, Iraq, Jordan, Syria (v. 23), and surprisingly Israel will join this alliance (v. 24).

Obviously a lot of the things listed by Isaiah seem unlikely or far-fetched given Egypt’s current status, but then again remember how few people could have imagined that a) the end of the Cold War would occur almost overnight in 1989, or b) the gospel would be preached in eight Russian missions (count as of today), or even that c) an LDS temple would be built in a communist country prior to the end of the Cold War. Clearly, the Lord’s purposes continue to go forth, despite the status of the world’s problems.

I firmly believe that by-and-by all of the concrete prophecies of the prophets will be fulfilled, meaning the ones that do not have conditions attached to them. If a prophet says “in the last days Egypt will have a temple” it will come to pass. However, if a prophet says “in the last days Egypt will have a temple if they do not align themselves with {insert foreign troublemaker here}” and Egypt still aligns themselves with that country then of course they will not receive a temple. In the verses outlined above by Isaiah the prophecies of the future of Egypt all seem pretty concrete to me.

It will be interesting to watch and see how this current Egyptian unrest unfolds, but if I had to guess where we are with regards to the status of Egypt and her future, I’d start at the beginning of the chapter (v. 2)—with a lot of terrible and exciting things ahead for the Egyptians. My personal take on the current murky future of Egypt combined with verse four is that the near future will bring some sort of extreme regime that will NOT be friendly to the United States or Israel, that will possibly attempt to or be successful in instigating Shariah Law throughout Egypt, thus restricting the freedoms of those people who are currently calling for freedoms, and serve as a “cruel lord” over the Egyptian people. It may get dark before it gets bright, but Isaiah has promised the Egyptian people that one day prior to the Lord’s Second Coming the restored gospel will flourish in the Land of the Pharaohs and that the saving ordinances of the gospel will be administered to the Egyptians by the Egyptian saints. It may seem distant, but it could very well all happen within the next 5-10 years.

Tetris

It’s been a busy summer, and by busy – I don’t just mean being a lazy blogger. My job has been hectic, still trying to get a hugemungus project out the door. Not to mention the contract work I pick up from time to time, but there’s also been a new addition to the family (I’ll explain, don’t worry), scout camps, day camps, weekend trips, et cetera, et cetera…et cetera…

Today though, I’m taking a moment to blog. Well, after I found a new theme – wordpress’s update seemed to kibosh the old theme. At any rate, I felt I had been away long enough – though in my life those can be famous last words…

I’ve always found the gospel interesting. I tend to look in on it, rather then from the inside out – probably due to my rebellious youth, but nonetheless I find it curious. It’s like tetris, or bejeweled in that respect that when you take a 20,000 ft look at it, it all fits. It makes sense to me. Let’s take the creation for instance, if you understand God is the ultimate scientist and knows all the laws that governs the universe – then it makes sense how it works. I don’t think it matters exactly how it started – there very well could have been a big bang, or something else…all that matters to me is that he knew what needed to be done – like that tiny grain of sand in a pearl starts a chain reaction that results in a beautiful pearl. He knows what triggers what, and finally produces a universe. Of course this a very simple explanation of a very deep subject that can get heated and leave a lot of people bitter and angry – and that’s not my goal here.

So how does looking back  fit in to all this, well I guess it’s just a way for me to fit those pieces in, and knock out another level (or gain another level in my testimony).

The Addition

Back to the addition to our family. A couple of weeks ago, in fact exactly 14 days ago, my wife gave birth to our 4th child – a little boy of big proportions. But even back when we first found about him my wife decided that this one was going to be all natural. She wasn’t happy with her experiences with other deliveries of our other children, and so though going natural would be the best – I tried to support her in that decision, but was worried about all the pain – she was firm though and felt it was the right thing to do.

So fast forward, up to the delivery (all the checkups were fine, healthy boy, etc…) and what do we find. This little bundle of joy was standing at attention trying to get out – what this means is unlike normal where the baby tucks his head (chin to chest) to torpedo out, our little boy had his head straight up (as if he were at attention) – this presents a larger, flatter portion of the head to push through – and of course he got stuck.

It got a little frantic there at the end, not by the midwife or the nurse – but by me. The boy’s pulse was dropping as he got stuck there and I got a little worried because my wife was having troubles during the pushing and the nurse very calmly said that he needed to come out soon.

So my wife (the trooper that she is) pushed with all her might and got him out – turns out he had the cord around his neck too, but the talk was that if she had gotten an epidural she wouldn’t have had the strength to push him out and would have had to get a c-section.

So looking back, some 7 months into the past – there was a choice made that determined the fate of this delivery. I see pieces lock into place and another row drop off. I’m sure people could chalk this up to good fortune, or luck – but I don’t see it that way. I see it as divine intervention making a suggestion to my wife to go natural with this birth to save her from a lot of pain, and suffering. In fact, I’m willing to lay down money that it was also to allow for us to have my son’s baptism 6 days later and for everyone to attend. Though I’m sure it connects to other things in the future that I’m not even aware of, not to mention the things that led up to it…here’s comes the programmer in me – but look at all the if else statements going on here. For all the old basic guys – it would be one giant if then goto program.

It amazes me that people would sooner forget or ignore the connective links that brings us to where we are today – and how God manages all that – not to mention adding variables to that. I’m reminded of a commercial I remember seeing some years ago for a phone company that was trying to show off it’s ability to keep callers connected by showing the originating caller’s call following a path, and if something happened to one of the connections it would go to another one to continue on it’s path to the final destination. This also can  be a diagram for our life with sin too. While we have our final destination, there are always problems along the way – one mistake doesn’t drop the call, it only redirects momentarily to try and get us back on the to the final destination – and continues to work even if our original path changes, the end stays the same.

I love the Gospel of Jesus Christ, it makes sense to me – it works. Sometimes it takes a look back to realize just how awesome it is, but it is real. I testify that it is the true gospel and the only gospel on earth.

Helaman has already touched on one of these signs.

I was flipping through the pages of my newly acquired book and glancing at the various signs that Brother Ridges covered when I was a bit startled to see that, according to Brother Ridges, number 27 has been fulfilled.

27. The Sun Will Be Darkened and the Moon Will Become as Blood

This is a very popular sign that was first introduced to the world by the prophet Joel:

Here is Brother Ridges’ explanation for why he has categorized this prophecy as having been fulfilled:

In the Saturday morning session of the October 2001 General Conference, “President Gordon B. Hinckley said something that changed my mind on this prophecy (he had previously thought it wise to leave this prophecy undefined). He revealed to us (bold added for emphasis):”

The era in which we live is the fullness of times spoken of in the scriptures, when God has brought together all of the elements of previous dispensations. From the day that He and His Beloved Son manifested themselves to     the boy Joseph, there has been a tremendous cascade of enlightenment poured out upon the world. The hearts of men have turned to their fathers in fulfillment of the words of Malachi. The vision of Joel has been fulfilled wherein he declared:

28 And it shall come to pass afterward, that I will pour out my spirit upon all flesh; and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, your old men shall dream dreams, your young men shall see visions:

29 And also upon the servants and upon the handmaids in those days will I pour out my spirit.

30 And I will shew wonders in the heavens and in the earth, blood, and fire, and pillars of smoke.

31 The sun shall be turned into darkness, and the moon into blood, before the great and the terrible day of the Lord come.

32 And it shall come to pass, that whosoever shall call on the name of the Lord shall be delivered: for in mount Zion and in Jerusalem shall be deliverance, as the Lord hath said, and in the remnant whom the Lord shall call”

(Joel 2:28–32).

However, he does mention that it is feasible that President Hinckley was referring to a part of the mentioned verses as being fulfilled, but not all. If that was the case, then why mention verses 31-32 after he just boldly stated that these words of Joel were fulfilled? I assume that it is possible that the latter explanation could be correct, but it does not seem plausible.

There remains a third explanation as well.

The scriptures, especially the Bible, are full of symbols. Is it possible that this well-known sign of the times could refer to concepts rather than objects? Oftentimes the sun is used to symbolize the celestial glory, while the moon is used to symbolize terrestrial glory (see D&C 76:75). Using this as a possibility, Brother Ridges suggests that the phrase the sun shall be turned into darkness, and the moon into blood could symbolize “that the vast majority of the inhabitants of the earth will cease to live according to either celestial or terrestrial law.”

But then again, it could very well refer to some sort of physical change to both the sun and the moon.

What are your thoughts?

Meditation

So the next stop on the bus ride to the second coming is one that got me thinking due to the first paragraph. I’ll quote a few bits of it so you can see how my train of thought proceeded.

When the Spirit stops working with the wicked, they lose their ability to think rationally...Righteous people are seen as their enemies, and a threat to personal freedom and independence, a threat to the exercising of their agency…evil deeds and cruelty become routine…[emphasis added by me]

Those key points got me thinking about today, don’t get me wrong though there have been isolated cases of evil through out our short history. But it seems to me that there’s an increasing amount of this in our day to day lives. Just turn on the TV, or read the news (especially on the internet) and you’ll understand what I mean.

The bit that really hit me was they lose their ability to think rationally. As of late I’ve gotten more interested in what’s happening in this nations political circles and it’s really quite frightening. These men and women, and it’s independent of party seem to have serious problems thinking rationally.  But I digress…

Let’s look at the scriptures used as examples in the book.

D&C 63:32

32 I, the Lord, am ^aangry with the ^bwicked; I am holding my ^cSpirit from the inhabitants of the earth.

This was written in 1831, how much worse is it now then it was then?

Luckily though, the book points out that this is one of those signs that should be looked at in a larger context. There are still many people that receive the guidance of the Spirit as witnessed in these scriptures;

D&C 95:4

4 For the preparation wherewith I design to prepare mine apostles to ^aprune my vineyard for the last time, that I may bring to pass my ^bstrange act, that I may ^cpour out my Spirit upon all flesh—

Joel 2:28–29

28 ¶ And it shall come to pass afterward, that I will ^apour out my ^bspirit upon all flesh; and your sons and your daughters shall ^cprophesy, your ^dold men shall ^edream dreams, your young men shall see ^fvisions:

29 And also upon the servants and upon the handmaids in those days will I pour out my spirit.

Men and Women are Equal Partners

I’ve started reading a fascinating book “65 Signs of the Times Leading up to the Second Coming” – David J. Ridges and I thought I might start a series of posts that opens the discussion for them, because I like to go beyond what he highlights in the book, to more of a let’s show examples in the world. Let’s talk about after effects, etc.

The author makes a good point to say this book isn’t written to scare people and uses quotes from prophets to try and set the tone. I’ll probably put these quotes on each of the posts so that we don’t forget and end up getting caught up in the signs. That isn’t what I want to do either.

Gordon B. Hinckley

I do not know what we did in the preexistence to merit the wonderful blessings we enjoy. We have come to earth in this great season in the long history of mankind. It is a marvelous age, the best of all. As we reflect on the the plodding course of mankind from the time of our first parents, we cannot help feeling grateful. ["Living in the Fulness of Times," Ensign, November 2001, p. 4]

Thomas S. Monson

I testify to you that our promised blessings are beyond measure. Though the storm clouds may gather, though the rains may pour down upon us, our knowledge of the gospel and our love of our Heavenly Father and of our Savior will comfort and sustain us and bring joy to our hearts as we walk uprightly and keep the commandments. There will be nothing in this world that can defeat us.

My beloved brothers and sisters, fear not. Be of good cheer. The future is as bright as your faith.

I declare that God lives and that He hears and answers our prayers. His Son, Jesus Christ, is our Savior and our Redeemer. Heaven’s blessings await us. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.[Ensign, May 2009, pp 89-92]

I think the first one I want to discuss, and as a matter of fact isn’t actually one of the 65 listed – but it is most certainly something happening and seemingly getting worse.

Pitting men against women, and women against men

In today’s modern world what are some themes we see? I know, that was a little vague, so let’s refine it a little more. First we each have roles – and this isn’t based on a sexist look, it’s based on prophetic counsel from our Lord through our leaders.

The Family: A Proclamation to the World

By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners. [emphasis added]

But what do we see happening? What are some examples in today’s world where men are pitted against women and women against men?

What do we see in today’s political arena, in the media, or maybe in our own circles?

Here’s one example of breaking down roles – I’ve noticed in commercials these days the trend (and I’m sure isn’t necessarily a new concept) that men are portrayed as bumbling fools, they couldn’t do anything without the heroine wife. No, I’m not saying women can’t do anything either – but the portrayal of men as incapable of knowing how to anything I think it pitting women against men (women are the new hero’s men are dumb as rocks). The examples for men spread over the centuries and can be found anywhere.

Doctrine and Covenants 121:39

We have learned by sad experience that it is the ^anature and disposition of almost all men, as soon as they get a little ^bauthority, as they suppose, they will immediately begin to exercise ^cunrighteous dominion.

So, let’s hear some examples that you can think of? Let’s discuss…

Eternal Family

This is the talk I was asked to give on the family – there might be some mistakes because I was editing it right before I gave it…lol. Also not long before church was to being, I was informed that one of the speakers wasn’t going to be there so I needed to speak for about 20 minutes – I’ve never spoken for that long before and had to bulk up my talk quickly…

I want to tell you a story about my parents.

I t takes place some years ago when they met each other and fell in love. They decided to start a family, but were later devastated when their first born daughter died only hours after being born. Out of her death grew a desire to find answers to why their baby had been taken from their lives and would they ever see her again.

This desire led to searching through different religions, trying to find one that answered their questions about families, and what happens after they die and how to stop the pain of death that still pulled at their heart strings.

About 6 years and another child later while being stationed in the Philippines, my parents were getting ready for the arrival of another child. They were introduced to a pair of special young men who taught them the concepts of eternal marriage and families. These were concepts that had troubled my mother constantly since she had lost her first child. Learning about the plan of salvation and eternal families was a miracle for my mother.

While this didn’t completely take away her pain, it did bring her comfort and knowledge that she would be united with the daughter she lost.  In later years they would go through the same trial again when another one of their daughters died.  This time though they knew about eternal families and had the peace that their family would one day be reunited again.

My parents joined the church not long after I was born, and soon after that we traveled to Salt Lake City and along with my older sister we were sealed together for time and all eternity.

While this story of mine might not be unique it highlights something important, even though my parents were not members of the church, family was very important to them and is what brought them to find the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Russell  M. Nelson said in a March issue of the Ensign,

“Also pivotal to God’s plan is the family. In fact, a purpose of the plan is to exalt the family. The earth was created so that we as premortal spirit children of our Father in Heaven could come to the earth and obtain physical bodies. We are here to be tried and tested. We are here to “choose liberty and eternal life, . . . or to choose captivity and death”. And best of all, we are allowed to fall in love, to be married, and to invite children into our families.”

But why is the family so important? Why does our church put so much emphasis on having a family?

On a whim I did a search for Jesus on the church’s web site – I just wanted to see how many results came back and there were over 24 thousand. The next search I did was for Family- this came back with over 27 thousand results. This would seem to indicate that family is an important factor in the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

In the November 1982 Ensign, President Ezra Taft Benson, explained in a talk titled “Fundamentals of Enduring Family Relationships”

He says…

“Today we are aware of great problems in our society. The most obvious are sexual promiscuity, homosexuality, drug abuse, alcoholism, vandalism, pornography, and violence.

These grave problems are symptoms of failure in the home—the disregarding of principles and practices established by God in the very beginning. “

In his talk he lists three fundamentals for a happy, enduring  family relationship, and this is the backbone of my talk today.

1. 1. A husband and wife must attain righteous unity and oneness in their goals, desires, and actions.

In Genesis 2:24 [Gen. 2:24] we are taught, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.”

In an Ensign article from Matthew O. Richardson he breaks down that verse and uses the words of prophets and other leaders to explain it.

Leaving – President Spencer W. Kimball taught that “couples do well to immediately find their own home, separate and apart from that of the in-laws on either side. President Kimball counseled, “Parents who hold, direct, and dictate to their married children and draw them away from their spouses are likely to regret the possible tragedy.” Some may wonder what possible “tragedy” awaits such couples. While it could be something as severe as divorce, perhaps the real tragedy is forfeiting a form of marriage the couple might have had, had they only enjoyed the opportunity to leave appropriately.

Cleaving – The term cleave, as used in Genesis, is derived from the Hebrew dawbak, meaning “cling, adhere, stick, catch by pursuit” or “follow close.” When the Savior speaks of cleaving to one’s wife in Matthew 19:5 [Matt. 19:5], the source word of cleave is from the Greek poskallah, meaning “glue or join.” By scriptural definition, then, we find that God expects us to “cling” to our spouse or to “stick” with him or her. But it should also be understood that this is not a one-time event but a condition that lasts throughout a couple’s marriage. President Hinckley has taught on several occasions that one’s spouse should be treated in special regard. He said that a husband should regard his wife “as the greatest treasure of his life.” In Matthew 6:21 [Matt. 6:21] we read, “For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also” (see also 3 Ne. 13:21).

Becoming One – Elder Richard G. Scott of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught, “it takes two—a man and a woman—to form a whole.” Unity in marriage is not achieved simply by kneeling at an altar and accepting a spouse. It requires effort for a couple to become one. Marital unity doesn’t mean that spouses agree on everything. It also doesn’t mean they have to spend every minute of every day together, think the same thoughts, and order the same meal at restaurants. Rather than relying on our interpretation of what “one flesh” means in marriage, it would be well to consider this divine concept as taught in the scriptures.

One Flesh – Paul taught the concept of unity to the Corinthians by using the body as an illustration. “For the body is not one member, but many” (1 Cor. 12:14). Paul taught that in spite of obvious differences in the various parts of the body, “the eye cannot say unto the hand, I have no need of thee: nor again the head to the feet, I have no need of you” (1 Cor. 12:21). In summary, he taught “that there should be no schism in the body; but that the members should have the same care one for another” (1 Cor. 12:25). It is easy to see the application of this metaphor to marriage. Neither spouse is more important than the other. Undoubtedly, individuals bring varying talents into their marriage, just as they each have differing roles, tasks, and functions. But using Paul’s perspective, one can say, “For marriage is not one member, but two. And the husband cannot say unto the wife, I have no need of thee: nor the wife again to the husband, I have no need of thee.” We may likewise conclude that there should be no schism in marriage but that husband and wife should have the same care one for another. To create such a relationship, President Kimball suggested, couples should realize that “each must accept literally and fully that the good of the little new family must always be superior to the good of either spouse.”

My wife and I have been married for 11 years now. We’ve had our struggles, but we’ve started realizing that where we want to be is going to take a combined effort and only if we’re on the same team. This applies to all facets of marriage.

In our marriage we realize that sometimes we are not on the same wavelength or path, and as a result things become tougher than they really should. But we find that when we are united on a common goal, it’s much easier to work towards it and overcome it.

President Benson also mentions that

“Fidelity to one’s marriage vows is absolutely essential for love, trust, and peace. Adultery is unequivocally condemned by the Lord.

Husbands and wives who love each other will find that love and loyalty are reciprocated. This love will provide a nurturing atmosphere for the emotional growth of children. Family life should be a time of happiness and joy that children can look back on with fond memories and associations”

What are some the messages that we are being bombarded with through TV, movies and books? What has been presented as the norm?

Among other things, it’s that berating, degrading, and demeaning our spouses and children is fair game, and usually humorous to our friends and colleagues.

Some time ago, when we were first married and my wife still worked, she would come home upset and disgusted by what her coworkers would talk about when there was time to sit around and chat. They would get together and talk about their spouses in degrading ways, and often left her wondering why they were even married.

But here’s the question for us as Latter Day Saints, would we talk about our eternal spouse that way? The person that we are suppose love with all our heart, do they deserve that type of infidelity? Are we vigilant in what we say and do when it comes to our families?

President Spencer W. Kimbal l said that we should have “total fidelity in marriage” and to me that means in all aspects of it, not just physically but in our behavior and how we speak about our spouses and families.

1. 2. Nurture your children with love and the admonitions of the Lord.

I’m glad President Benson says “Rearing happy, peaceful children is no easy challenge in today’s world”, and I’m sure some of you know this first hand. But he does go on to say that it can and is being done, so there is hope.

President Benson also says “Above all else, children need to know and feel they are loved, wanted, and appreciated. They need to be assured of that often. Obviously, this is a role parents should fill, and most often the mother can do it best.”

M. Russell Ballard gives 5 ideas for how to gain that happy and enduring family:

1. Full and equal partnerships. Men and women joined together in marriage need to work together as a full partnership. However, a full and equal partnership between men and women does not imply the roles played by the two sexes are the same in God’s grand design for His children. As the proclamation clearly states, men and women, though spiritually equal, are entrusted with different but equally significant roles. These roles complement each other. Men are given stewardship over the sacred ordinances of the priesthood. To women, God gives stewardship over bestowing and nurturing mortal life, including providing physical bodies for God’s spirit children and guiding those children toward a knowledge of gospel truths. These stewardships, equally sacred and important, do not involve any false ideas about domination or subordination. Each stewardship is essential for the spiritual progression of all family members, parents and children alike.

Family stewardships thus must be understood in terms of obligations and responsibilities—and in terms of love, service, and interdependence. Men who attempt to dominate their wives, who seek to exercise unrighteous dominion without regard to spousal counsel and sensitivities, simply don’t understand that such actions are contrary to God’s will.

2. Fathers. The proclamation states, “Fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families.” They teach their families the gospel and lead in kindness, following the counsel found in section 121 of the Doctrine and Covenants (see D&C 121:34–36).

Fathers perform priesthood ordinances and give priesthood blessings, including father’s blessings to their children. They pray for and with family members, collectively and individually. They set an example of respect and love for their eternal companion and mother of their children. In all things they follow the example of the Savior and strive to be worthy of His name and His blessing. Fathers should seek constantly for guidance from the Holy Ghost so they will know what to do, what to say, and also know what not to do and what not to say. They serve the family and the Church in the spirit of love and enthusiasm, by example preparing family members to serve—especially preparing sons to serve as worthy missionaries.

3. Mothers. The proclamation teaches that “mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children.” Nurturing refers to parenting behaviors such as warmth, support, bonding, attachment, recognizing each child’s unique abilities, and attending to children’s needs. Nurturing in and of itself is more important in the development of a child than is any particular method or technique of child rearing. It hardly needs saying that nurturing is best carried out in a stable, safe, family context.

A mother’s nurturing love arouses in children, from their earliest days on earth, an awakening of the memories of love and goodness they experienced in their premortal existence. Because our mothers love us, we learn, or more accurately remember, that God also loves us.

Today there is significant pressure in our materialistic world to have and spend more money. Unfortunately, this draws married mothers to work outside the home in order to provide a second income. As husbands, wives, and children recognize the difference between basic necessities and material wants, they lessen family financial burdens and contribute to helping mothers be at home. Decisions about working outside the home are difficult ones and need to be made prayerfully, keeping ever in mind the counsel of the living prophets on this complex issue.

4. Principles for marriage and families. From the proclamation we learn that “successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities.” Parents should work to create loving, eternal connections with their children. Reproof or correction will sometimes be required. But it must be done sensitively, persuasively, with an increase of love thereafter lest the child esteem the parent to be an enemy (see D&C 121:43).

It can be equally destructive when parents are too permissive and overindulge their children, allowing children to do as they please. Parents need to set limits in accordance with the importance of the matter involved and the child’s disposition and maturity. Help children understand the reasons for rules, and always follow through with appropriate discipline when rules are broken. It is important as well to praise appropriate behavior. It will challenge all of your creativity and patience to maintain this balance, but the rewards will be great. Children who understand their boundaries through the consistent application of important rules are more likely to do well at school, to be more self-controlled, and to be more willing to abide by the laws of the land.

5. Family councils. As you would expect to hear from me, one of the best tools we have as parents is the family council. I cannot emphasize enough its importance in helping to understand and address challenges in the family. When members of one family began to feel unusual contention invading their home, they called a family council to discuss the situation. The father and then the mother explained to their children what they had observed and asked how each felt about it. The mother and father learned that since their two oldest children had left home, one to be married and one to go to college, an unfair burden of responsibility had been unwittingly shifted to the two oldest children remaining at home, and they were becoming resentful. By counseling together and listening to what their children were feeling, the family made a more equitable distribution of responsibility among the children, resolving much of the frustration and tension in the home.

I recognize that there are as many kinds of family councils as there are different kinds of families. Family councils can consist of one parent and one child, of two parents and several children, of just two parents, or of just siblings, and so on. Regardless of the size or makeup of the family council, what really matters are loving motivation, an atmosphere that encourages free and open discussion, and a willingness to listen to the honest input of all council members—as well as to the whisperings of the Holy Spirit.

My wife and I both agree that letting our children know that they are loved is one of the most important aspects in raising our children. While we don’t know everything, we do know that if children don’t find love in their homes they will try to find it anywhere they can, which can lead to sadness and sorrow.

While I struggle with my kids at times, luckily I have a wonderful wife who helps me remember what the goal is and how to try and reach it.

In “The Family: A Proclamation to the World” it says

“Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, to teach them to love and serve one another, to observe the commandments of God and to be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations.”

With children in school and then homework, how much quality time is left during the day to spend with our children? Are we doing all we can to help them learn and understand the gospel and feel loved? I know this is an area where I can do better – but luckily my wife has done a great job, and my kids love listening to gospel stories and learning about the gospel.

As our children have grown and our lives have become more hectic spending quality time together get’s harder – I’m sure some family’s have even more trouble finding time when everyone is at home together.

Some years ago, when we were living in Logan I had to commute to my job – at one point I was driving for about 2 hours each way to work. That left little time for the family. But through different circumstances– the Lord has blessed my family with me working only 10 minutes away and having a lot more time together. Along with Family Home evening, we try to have an additional game night per week, and we try to have dinner together every night so we can talk about our day to each other.

1. 3. Parents must prepare their children for the ordinances of the gospel.

President Benson says

“The most important teachings in the home are spiritual. Parents are commanded to prepare their sons and daughters for the ordinances of the gospel: baptism, confirmation, priesthood ordinations, and temple marriage. They are to teach them to respect and honor the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. Most importantly, parents are to instill within their children a desire for eternal life and to earnestly seek that goal above all else.

Eternal life may be obtained only by obedience to the laws and ordinances of the gospel.

When parents themselves have complied with the ordinances of salvation, when they have set the example of a temple marriage, not only is their own marriage more likely to succeed, but their children are far more likely to follow their example.

Parents who provide such a home will have, as the Lord has said, “a house of prayer, a house of fasting, a house of faith, a house of learning, … a house of order, a house of God.” (D&C 88:119.) Regardless of how modest or humble that home may be, it will have love, happiness, peace, and joy. Children will grow up in righteousness and truth and will desire to serve the Lord.”

In a few months Ethan will be 8 years old and in another 9 months after that Alexander will be old enough to receive the Aaronic Priesthood. I am grateful that I am worthy enough to participate in these ordinances with them and am excited for them to enter into these new chapters of their life.

We all want to succeed in raising righteous children and to have an eternal family, but it won’t happen without sacrifice and work. This happens by example and commitment to the gospel.

I want to testify that I know an eternal family is key to God’s plan, since we are created in the image of Heavenly Father and everything is patterned after him then it only makes since that marriage and family is part of the plan. In order for us to have that eternal family we need to work on our examples as parents and help our children to understand how much they mean to us. We also need to be worthy enough to be sealed to them.

I want to leave you with a quote from Joseph F. Smith.

“The home is what needs reforming. Try today, and tomorrow, to make a change in your home by praying twice a day with your family. … Ask a blessing upon every meal you eat. Spend ten minutes … reading a chapter from the words of the Lord in the [scriptures]. … Let love, peace, and the Spirit of the Lord, kindness, charity, sacrifice for others, abound in your families. Banish harsh words, … and let the Spirit of God take possession of your hearts. Teach to your children these things, in spirit and power. … Not one child in a hundred would go astray, if the home environment, example and training, were in harmony with … the gospel of Christ.”

And I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ amen…

Moses, well not this guy, but the real Moses

While I was home eating lunch today, no one was home and I got the notion to start reading Moses. So I grabbed the IPod Touch and started reading. I got to the second chapter, specifically version 20 (Moses 2:20) .

And I, God, said: Let the waters bring forth abundantly the moving creature that hath life, and fowl which may fly above the earth in the open firmament of heaven.

It struck me, that this reads as if God is saying the waters bring forth live creatures – including birds. Now I know the LDS church takes no official position on evolution, it got me thinking – strictly subjectively about this.

I turned to twitter and broadcasted my question, to see if I could get some answers or comments on this.

Quickly I was replied to by LDSGuy, with his thoughts on it. He responded with:

Compare Moses 2:20–23 with Abraham 4:20–23

So I went and checked it out.

20 And the Gods said: Let us prepare the waters to bring forth abundantly the moving creatures that have life; and the fowl, that they may fly above the earth in the open expanse of heaven.
21 And the Gods prepared the waters that they might bring forth great ^awhales, and every living creature that moveth, which the waters were to bring forth abundantly after their kind; and every winged fowl after their kind. And the Gods saw that they would be obeyed, and that their plan was good.
22 And the Gods said: We will bless them, and cause them to be fruitful and multiply, and fill the waters in the seas or ^agreat waters; and cause the fowl to multiply in the earth.
23 And it came to pass that it was from evening until morning that they called night; and it came to pass that it was from morning until evening that they called day; and it was the fifth time.

Which again, seems to me to read the same as Moses.

# LDSguy @HelamansArmy when read in context I’m going to say that its solely talking about the waters being a home to whales et al.
# LDSguy @HelamansArmy its not implying the whales and “moving creature(s)” were created from the ocean.
# LDSguy @HelamansArmy perhaps “prepared the waters that they might bring forth…every living creature” (Abr. 4:21) is in ref. to us being 70% agua?
# LDSguy @HelamansArmy and we need water to survive. on the fifth day God created waters. without water we’d shrivel up & die. all mammals. whales 2
# LDSguy @HelamansArmy like i said, 2 me it reads that the Gods created waters on 5th day. all of them. & w/o it all mammals and birds wld die.

It’s funny, I never had really thought about it that manner. As in reference to animals needing water. I always put the creation in the context of how it would work scientifically, like if the earth was forming – how would it form step by step. The waters would be down the line after the mountains and stuff – but for some reason it escaped me that the waters needed to come before animals (because they need water to survive) – DUH! Though now that I reread the previous verses, grass (plants) are created on the 3rd day – so that kind of blows out my theory and LDSGuys.

At any rate, while I don’t know that it’s ultimately important – knowing the exact meaning and reason behind how the text is written, it sure would be nice to have some knowledge on this subject.

So I’m asking for any input or thoughts on the subject. Does anyone know of anything written on the subject, or know anything on it – please comment on this and let me know!

Don't get led astray

And saith unto him, All these things will I give thee, if thou wilt fall down and worship me.

This post was brought about after reading about a bill that would in essence force people to be charitable, which got me thinking about all the things that Satan has mimicked. By this is I mean all those things that God has given us that are direct gifts from Him. Without further todo, the list.

Priesthood vs Priestcraft

Priesthood – The priesthood is the eternal power and authority of God. Through the priesthood God created and governs the heavens and the earth. Through this power He redeems and exalts His children, bringing to pass “the immortality and eternal life of man” (Moses 1:39). God gives priesthood authority to worthy male members of the Church so they can act in His name for the salvation of His children. Priesthood holders can be authorized to preach the gospel, administer the ordinances of salvation, and govern the kingdom of God on the earth.

Priestcraft - 2 Nephi 26:29, we read: He commandeth that there shall be no priestcrafts, for, behold, priestcrafts are that men preach and set themselves up for a light unto the world, that they may get gain and praise of the world; but they seek not the welfare of Zion.

It seems like a no brainer, right? On the one hand you have an eternal power and authority, this is what created the universe! Then on the other you have people mimicking a power and authority that wasn’t bestowed upon them, and in some cases they will even say they don’t have it nor do they need it to perform miracles.

Charity vs Selfishness

Charity – Charity is the pure love of Christ. It is the love that Christ has for the children of men and that the children of men should have for one another. It is the highest, noblest, and strongest kind of love and the most joyous to the soul (see 1 Nephi 11:23).

Selfishness – I know this is like the polar opposite here, but think about it. What are some of the root causes of today’s problems? In the Topical Guide we can read that selfishness, also goes with Covetousness, Greed, Lust, and Pride. But these are promoted as good things!

There’s been a round of commercials on lately, I don’t recall the name of them or who’s putting them on, but they’re about couples or families. Basically the premise is they take the phrase “Mine and Yours” and convert it to “Ours”, or the word “Me” and convert it to “We”. Truth is, I know a lot of people who have gotten into a mindset that what’s theirs is theirs and that’s all their is to it. I also have a sneaking suspicion that this is one of the reasons (along with others listed up there) that marriages fail so often – people aren’t willing to be charitable in their relationships.

Love vs Lust

Love - I know, this was mentioned above, but I think it takes a closer look. Love is a feeling of deep devotion, concern, and affection. The greatest example of God’s love for His children is found in the infinite Atonement of Jesus Christ. Love for God and fellow men is a characteristic of disciples of Jesus Christ.

Lust – And what does Satan come up with as a knock-off, lust. Lust can destroy families, where Love promotes families. Lust is dark, and dirty and gives into cravings, where Love is bright and give power to overcome and strengths out of our weaknesses.

I see a trend here. But another reason for the ailments in the world can be chalked up to lust. Lusting for riches, power, reputation, people. If a person was truly a loving person there would be none of that. I’ve always maintained that if a person was truly living a Christ like life, the side-effects would be these attributes listed here. The world wouldn’t be the way it is.

Consecration vs Socialism

Consecration – The United Order exalts the poor and humbles the rich. In the process both are sanctified. The poor, released from the bondage and humiliating limitations of poverty, are enabled as free men to rise to their full potential, both temporally and spiritually. The rich, by consecration and by imparting of their surplus for the benefit of the poor, not by constraint but willingly as an act of free will, evidence that charity for their fellowmen characterized by Mormon as “the pure love of Christ.” (Moro. 7:47.) [1. Marion G. Romney - Socialism & The United Order 1966]

Socialism - Socialism, wholly materialistic, is founded in the wisdom of men and not of God. Although all socialists may not be atheists, none of them in theory or practice seek the Lord to establish his righteousness.[2. ibid, Marion G. Romney - Socialism & The United Order 1966]

Of course Consecration only works when we are truly living a Christ like life (remember, you gotta have those side-effects!). Socialsm is just a fake way of trying to make it happen, except it really is nothing like it. Being forced into giving up my extra is nothing like loving my fellow man and giving him of my extra. Compassion does not equal compulsion.

I know there’s more of these out there, I’m always thinking to myself “look another imitation” but wouldn’t you know it, my mind has gone blank. So if you have any suggestions, let me know – and I’ll update this post with additional items.